March 10, 2005

dsico again!

Motorhead said it best when Lemmy growled, “You know I’m going to lose/ And gambling is for fools/ But that’s the way I like it, baby/ I don’t want to live forever” (‘Ace of Spades.’)
In that vein I have employed the services of Ms Cobina, a tarot reader, to predict the future of Dscio That No-Talent Hack, aka Luke Collison, and his new EP You Fight Like A Girl.
You might know Dsico’s music from the mash-ups and weirdo electro covers he used to do (like his cover of ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’ that they used to play on Triple J and the mash-up of Missy Eliot and Joy Division called ‘Love Will Freak Us’) or the previous entries on this blog. Dsico has chucked out those mash-ups with the stencil grafitti and trucker caps of yesteryear and put out a very fucking cool alt-pop EP.
Dsico asked Ms Cobina some pressing questions and then she dutifully shuffled the tarot deck and came out with some shockingly accurate generalisations.

Dsico: Will You Fight Like A Girl lead to great things, like me and Kylie getting together, or the gutter?
Cobina: Ace of Swords: Gift of social acclaim. Your ability to win at traditional games is assured, but don’t alienate the people you need to get you there in the first place. You might meet them on the way down again.

Will I be able to afford a Vespa scooter with the royalties and sales of the EP?
Six of Cups: Childhood and strength from the past. It seems the Vespa means something important to you on a subconscious level. You should examine why this is so important to you and ask yourself when you saw one for the first time.

Will I ever find true love?
Page of Swords: Counter-cultural youth. I see someone to whom gender is a blur; quite a free spirit. Relax, the cards say you’ll get there.

Will I ever get to play the Big Day Out and hang out with Sonic Youth and the Chemical Brothers?
Emperor (reversed): Fanaticism and a lust for power. Don’t let external forces shape your sense of self. Your successes won’t be as rewarding as you may think they are now.

Is there any way out of my dreary daily routine in consulting?
Queen of Swords: Late revolutionary bloomer. Take a job with that ball-busting broad. She knows how to keep you in check and the best way to get you moving: the tried and true carrot and stick method. I see you in something politically motivated.

What really happened between Delta and Philippoussis?
Eight of Cups: Moving on and rejection of the present. Only one of them wanted to transcend the desire for material success.

When will I learn to play the guitar better?
Queen of Cups: Intuitive creativity. I suggest practice, not practicing.

Was it a mistake to stop making mash-ups and start making original music?
The Emperor: Domination and control. I think what you’re asking is, “Am I a cunt for wanting to be successful?” You want the good things in life and the status that comes with conspicuous success. Think more about why you want that Vespa and how you reached this point— that is how you will find the answer.