stop the carnage

Today we were told by Ronald from the Matey Mission [see the June 5th blog] that things were going to change around here. Apparently this followed on from an address to the masses made previously, which I missed because I slept in and saw an asian guy collapse [see the June 19th blog entry], that explained there were to be 'procedural' changes. Such changes would explain why the sign-in/sign-out book is now hidden during the day. This means that you can't just sign in and out at once, meaning you can't leave whenever you like.

Ronald came into the room and asked if anyone wanted to volunteer to build websites for community houses. For those of you unfamiliar with what a community house is, these are places where people can have meetings, sometimes they have classes and Neighbourhood Watch gatherings. 'Community' in this case means "old people with nothing better to do than engrave numbers on the backs of their VCRs." When Neighbourhood Watch was mentioned, I immediately thought that there was no way that I wanted to have anything to do with it. Only two people volunteered. As I've said previously, there's always one or two keen bastards.

Through a series of farcical situations involving quantum theory, my Work for the Dole experiences served as the inspiration for the movie Mommie Dearest.

Due to the lacklustre response, Ronald went into a speech about how there were going to be more changes around the Matey Mission. We were told that they were rewriting their mission statement or some shit, and that there would be punitive measures added to make us work on particular projects to be enacted within the next fortnight or so. He then had a bit of a sook about the unenthusiastic participation of some (I felt conspicuous), and intimated that we should be grateful to be there, because there's "a waiting list of 150 people wanting to get into this programme."

What rockin' Ronald and his pirate earring seem to have overlooked is that we are forced to come here. I don't want to be here. There are other things I could be doing; watching Jerry Springer, working on my zine for this weekend's symposium, listening to heavy metal.

So the brains-trust of the Matey Mission has decided the we will be compelled to enjoy our wonderful experiences here, under penalty of removing society's safety net. It's all stick and no carrot. Whether or not you agree with the 'mutual obligation' regime, it's hard to see why we should be compelled to be enthusiastic. Whatever happens, I have a feeling that if I'm forced to work on anything, Ronald might be a little disappointed with the quality of my work.

This all means I'm going to look for a way out of here. E-mail me your suggestions: daddy0_86@hotmail.com .